A Guiding Star: Tips for Teachers #1

The Importance of Having A Mentor Teacher

One of the best "gold nuggets" of wisdom I can give to a teacher, newbie or not, is to get a mentor!

 Seriously!!! 

 One of the things I am constantly working on is getting the courage to ask others for help.  Asking for help is just not comfortable or enjoyable for me.  I have always felt that if I have to ask for help, then I have already failed. Luckily for me, the school that I work at required all new hires, regardless of experience to get a mentor or "buddy." This was permission to ask for help! Yay!

Having a mentor was probably the biggest contributor to my success this year. When struggling with figuring out my identity as a teacher (i.e. how to discipline and interact with students), my mentor was extremely influential.  I remember a particularly trying week where I was at my wits end, and she told me, "Don't give students permission to make you have a bad day."

You see, what I was doing, is putting the successes and failures of the students on my shoulders.  In actuality, I am a small part of the equation that results in the success or failure of a student.  At the end of the day, the majority of the responsibility was on the student.

After this realization, I began sharing with students that they are a powerful force in their lives.  They alone decide how far they will go, how well they will do.  I am simply a helping hand in their journey  towards success, if they choose to reach for it.

When struggling with discipline, my mentor was also able to suggest powerful books to read, such as Ruby Paine's, "A Framework for Understanding Poverty."  This book gave key insight into interacting with the type of students I work with.  I learned the importance of consistency.  When working with students whose lives are always fluctuating, whether it is the tendency of many of them to move around, or the instability of their parents' jobs, it is vital that they can depend on me to be consistent.

I cannot waver for a single moment.  If I say there are consequences for talking out of turn, then there WILL be consequences, not just the first few times, but EVERY time.

I also learned from my mentor to set boundaries, both emotional and in terms of time.  I cannot be a student's friend, I am their leader, adviser, teacher, and mentor, but I am not a buddy.  If my hours available are Monday and Wednesday until 4:30pm, then they can see me during those times to make up work, and not the Friday before grades are due.  Work is a PART of me, not the WHOLE, and being told by my mentor to make sure that I have free time was a relief!  I learned that it is vital to balance work and life, and work should NOT get the majority.

Some of you may be shaking you heads at the fact that I am unwilling to sacrifice my personal time and sanity for the sake of a student, and I can understand.  But like my mentor explained to me, y'all are on burnout road. 

Balance is key.  Consistency is key.  Having someone who is wiser than you is key.  Take it from me, reaching out for help was the best thing I did all year.

If you are interested in reading Ruby Paine's book, click the link below: